Update: The Good Wife's Guide

I am in love with the 1950's and 1960's.  Seriously, the husband and I joke all the time that we were clearly both born in the wrong decade because we both posess old souls.  There's just something so calm and simple about that time.  I'm not saying everything was perfect, but it was most definitely a different time.

I've posted a bit about our traditional marriage and even went on to discuss a bit about the old version of the Good Wife's Guide, circa 1955.    I thought it might be fun to put together a guide for today's modern, traditional wife- like me!

The Good Wife's Guide 2015

Put on real clothes in the morning.  Even if all you do is take off the PJ's and put on the yoga pants, just do it.  Brush your teeth, wash your face and comb your hair.

Get up first and make your home a warm and inviting place.  Open the curtains, turn on some lights, light a candle or two and then start breakfast for your family.  

Send your husband to work fed and happy.  And don't forget to pack him a lunch.

Keep an eye on the clutter throughout the day.  Don't leave trash or dirty dishes lying around but rather adopt a "clean as you go" attitude to ensure your home is always looking it's best.  

Set up a weekly chore/task list.

Plan your day so that nothing is forgotten.  Try to follow a daily routine so that your family knows what to expect and to help establish boundaries.

Make dinner.  Every night.  From scratch.

Always welcome your husband home with hugs and kisses.  Even if you're upset, just jump that man as soon as he walks in the door.

Establish couple time.  Strict bedtimes are your best friend- get those kids to bed and then cuddle with your husband.  Better yet, have sex with him.  Lots of it.

Always have freshly baked goodies on display.

Take care of everything you are physically able to so that your husband has more time to enjoy his time at home with his family.  Do all the shopping, take the kids to their appointments/practices, household chores, pets etc.  

Always wear fabulous shoes, carry a great purse and have your nails done.  If you have these 3 things, you will always look put together even when you don't feel like you are.

Do not call your husband during the day just to complain and do not greet him at the door with your frustrations and upset.  Give him time to unwind and then try to discuss things.

Always have your husband's favorite beverage on hand and a few snacks or things they enjoy.

Don't talk bad about your husband to anyone.  Ever.

Take pride in yourself.  If you think you're sexy, your husband will too.  Allow yourself some down time, be mindful of your appearance and do things that nurture your soul.

So there you have it.  Today's guide for the modern, traditional wife.  Want to read more?  

Marriage- A Traditional Housewife

On Being a Traditional Wife

Homeschool Prayer

It's been a particularly difficult week and it's only Tuesday.  Sigh....

So today I posted this prayer over on the Facebook page.  If you're struggling, please know that you aren't alone.  No one ever said this would be easy but I promise it will be worth it.

Lord,

Thank You for this blessing. For the ability to stay home with my child, to teach, to nurture, to guide.

Please continue to provide me the patience to carry on. To sit & explain the same exact thing day in and day out. To struggle side by side with my child as I fight to teach & they push to learn.

Give me the strength to shrug off the naysayers. The ability to focus on my child & his strengths as we battle both the highs & lows from learning at home.

Protect us as we travel this road less traveled. Forgive me my many, many mistakes as I struggle to be Wife, Mother & Homeschooler. For it is through you that all things are possible.

And when the load seems to much to bear, thank you Lord for giving me the wisdom to remember the why. The reason we call ourselves homeschoolers- because even in the struggle, there is joy.

Thank you Lord for this blessing.

Amen.

Fettuccine Alfredo

One of my many talents is the ability to whip up a batch of homemade fettuccine alfredo in about 20 minutes.  No Joke.

And because I think you all are awesome and should have this recipe in your repertoire- I'm sharing with you today!

SO good!

Fettuccine Alfredo

1 box fettuccine pasta
2 1/2 cups milk
1 cup heavy cream
1 1/2 cups Parmesan cheese
butter
2 tablespoons flour
salt and pepper
nutmeg

Start by boiling your pasta.  At the same time, begin your sauce by melting 2 tablespoons butter.  When melted add in flour to create a roux.  Cook on very low for just a minute.  When your flour and butter are combined, start to slowly add in your milk and then cream.

Cook your flour in melted butter to create a roux.

Slowly add in milk/cream for nice, thick sauce.

Finally, when you have a thick sauce- add in your parm cheese and salt and pepper to taste.  At this point, your pasta should be done.  So drain and set aside.

When your parm cheese is combined in your sauce, put one more tablespoon of butter on top and a good pinch of nutmeg.  Combine with your pasta.

Finish with butter & pinch of nutmeg.

Seriously- SO easy.  You can totally add cooked chicken or some veggies but we are purists and like it just the way it is.

Enjoy!

If You Don't Teach Them, Someone Else Will

One afternoon we were all driving home from the kiddo's soccer game and we started talking about drugs.  Hardcore things, like meth, peer pressure and addiction.  To clarify, yes- my child is nine years old, almost ten.

Now, at this point, you may be thinking that we as parents have lost our minds.  I get it.  Really, I do.  Drugs are a hot topic.  Just like sex and bullying.  But that doesn't mean we shouldn't talk about them with our children, it simply means we need to be careful in what we say.

We've been talking honestly with the kiddo for years now about drugs and alcohol.  He's seen some programs and documentaries that show exactly what happens to people who suffer addiction.  He knows words like meth and marijuana and because we live in Washington State where it's now legal to smoke pot in public, he's also smelled it.  He's seen Daddy have a few beers with friends and he knows that Mommy likes to have a vodka sometimes on the weekends.  We do not hide this part of life from him but rather choose to model good choices and responsibility.

So that afternoon, while driving home, we talked about drugs and alcohol abuse.  Again.  The kiddo was asking specifically how old he had to be in order to be allowed to drink.  

Me- You need to be 21.  But just because you're old enough doesn't mean you're ready.

"What do you mean Mom?"

Me- Well, drinking is a big responsibility.  You need to be able to learn when and where to drink, how to do so responsibly, how to be safe and to recognize when you are in a bad situation.

"So like- if all my friends are getting drunk, I should probably not drink.  That way I can help them and make sure they don't get stupid."

Me- Yes, that's one thing.  But you also need to be very careful because addiction runs in our family.  Just like cancer or other diseases, addiction is a disease.

Husband- It's a slippery slope kiddo.  Your mind might say that you don't want to drink or do drugs but many times, your body says something different.  At that point, you don't have a whole lot of control over your choices and sometimes all it takes is one time for you to get yourself in some serious trouble.

"I know Dad.  People don't always have a choice because their bodies become addicted."

Husband- Exactly.  And because of this, you need to understand that there are simply some things in life that we stay away from and don't mess with.

So yes- we talk about drugs, alcohol and addiction.  We do not shy away from the difficult subjects but see them as an opportunity to guide our child, to show him the right path to follow.  As parents, you don't always get to pick and choose what you want to teach your child because the reality is- if you don't teach them, someone else will.  And then where will you be?

I encourage all of you to get in there and talk about the difficult subjects.   Here's a few key points to help you along the way.

• Be fact based.  Use the real words for things and don't make up silly nicknames or use generic terms like "that" or "it".
• Seek out opportunities to discuss these topics.  Your kids will be naturally curious so instead of saying "we'll talk about it later" just go ahead and address it head on.
• Stay casual and be open.  Don't make a huge deal of out it because if you do, chances are they won't want to talk with you again.
• Keep it age appropriate.  Just because your kid has specific questions doesn't mean they are ready to hear it all.  Leave it at a level they can understand and as they get older, you can continue to increase the amount of knowledge you give them about delicate subjects.
• Don't be embarrassed.  If you're nervous or uncomfortable, they will be too.
• Be safety minded.  Many of these difficult topics are huge safety issues.  Teen pregnancy, overdoses, gun safety anyone?  Teach them how to be safe and responsible.

Best of luck to you parents, you can do this!

Click here to read about the day I talked to the kiddo about suicide.

Let Me Tell You a Little Story

The husband & I have this little game we play.  He will say "I Love You" & I will say it back.  Then he'll say it again & I'll say, "tell me something you love".  This works both ways of course- but we often take the time to tell the other exactly what we love about them.

Seriously.  How adorable are we, right?!?

Last night, I asked the husband to tell me something he loves about me.  Normally it's the same kind of stuff (you take care of me, you're my best friend, you are kind etc) but last night...last night it made me want to cry.

Here's what he had to say-

"I love the changes you are making to our food and the way we live.  I love that you care enough to make it a priority.  I love what you're doing for us."

And you guys....I just....I can't even....IT.  WAS.  AWESOME.  That last part was my favorite.  I love what you're doing for us.  As a wife and a mother- it just doesn't get any better then this. It just doesn't.

Because let's face it, it's been a struggle.  Changing the way my family eats, reducing our meat consumption, eating more vegan dishes, more whole foods, not buying the junk and processed crap anymore- yeah, you could say there's been some battles.  I never thought I would get to a point where my husband would thank me for all that I'm doing.  Sure, I knew I would hear less complaining but to actually have him understand and appreciate all the work I'm doing- it's simply an amazing feeling.

So I want you to walk away from this little story with two things.

#1- That saying "I Love You" often is great but telling your spouse what you love about them, is even better.  Hearing them explain what it is about you that they love is just seriously some pretty good stuff.  Not too mention, very love affirming.  Yeah- I just made that up.  Love affirming mmkay...

#2- Hang in there.  My boys fought the good fight when it came to our food and lifestyle changes.  But here we are years later and they are thanking me for all that I'm doing.  They get it.  They really, really get it.

And that's it.  The end.

Top 10 Myths About Homeschoolers

Well here it is, a list of all the silly and ridiculous things that people think about homeschooling and homeschoolers in general.  No particular order but #1 is a the top of the list because HELLO, it's like the single most asked question about homeschoolers EVER.  Seriously.  EVER.

1. We are freaks and have no friends.  Ah yes, the dreaded socialization question.  People think we are hermits just hiding away in our homes scared to venture out into the real world.  Well, that couldn't be further from the truth.  Homeschoolers spend quite a bit of time socializing outside the walls of their homes thank you very much.  In fact, studies have proven that homeschooled kids benefit from this way of socialization much more then that found in a public school environment.  Google it if you don't believe me.
2. That we are all religious.  So here's the deal, people choose to homeschool for a variety of reasons.  And yes, religion is most definitely one of them but it's not the only reason.
3. Homeschoolers are weird and will grow up to be social outcasts.  Don't be afraid mmkay...embrace the weirdness.  Because let's face it, it takes a certain kind of "strange" to live this lifestyle, but I promise that we aren't any weirder then you are.
4. We have tons of free time.  BWAHAHAHA!  Excuse me but I just busted a gut laughing my rear end off over here.  Now that's some funny business.  The truth of the matter is that homeschoolers are probably MORE busy then your average family, it's just a different kind of busy.  And no, we don't sit around the house all day watching TV.  Homeschooling does not equal lazy.
5. That we hate all things related to public education.  This is one myth that personally frustrates the crap out of me.  I LOVE public school teachers but I'm saddened over the entire system as a whole.  Most homeschoolers that I've met feel exactly the same way.  Teachers have a hard job and we acknowledge and appreciate all that they do for our children, even if our kids are personally not in their classrooms.
6. We are all helicopter parents and afraid to send our kids out into the real world.  Yes, I am very careful and diligent with my child and his safety.  But I am not hovering nearby at every single moment.  In fact, my personal parenting style is much, MUCH more relaxed.  Homeschoolers want their kids to learn and part of that is giving them the freedom to go and experience things.
7. You'll never get into a good college.  Umm...did you know that colleges are actively recruiting homeschoolers?  Probably not as diligently as they do high school football players in the great state of Texas, but it's still happening.  We are on the "most desirable" list and that's a pretty awesome place to be.
8. Parents are not qualified to teach.  Ok, so perhaps some of us make better teachers then others but parents, you teach your children every single day.  You teach them manners, you taught them their ABC's, you teach them to tie their shoes- so why in the world would you say we aren't qualified to teach other subjects?  Umm...that's all we do as parents is teach.
9. We are all the same.  If you've met one homeschooler you've met them all, right?  Umm...no.  We are all different and there is no one right way to homeschool or one right reason to choose to homeschool.  We come from all different walks of life and that's a good thing mmkay...
10. Homeschooling is expensive.  This couldn't be further from the truth.  Homeschooling takes work and sacrifice and yes, you might have to make some changes but it can be done.  It's possible to work and homeschool and it's possible to use free or low cost curriculum- it just takes a little work and ingenuity.

So there it is, my top 10 list.  Do you think I've left anything out?

Crockpot Shredded Beef

"Write that recipe down Hun.  Do what you need to do but don't you loose that, it's good stuff" are the exact words the husband said after eating this for the very first time.  He almost never says that so I knew it was a winner and that I simply HAD to share it with all of you.

This works great for tacos, as a filling for taquitos or enchiladas and you can even serve it over rice.  And the best part- the crockpot does all the work for you!  LOVE that!


Crockpot Shredded Beef


1-2 pounds beef steak (top round is what's shown in this photo)

Break your meat with a fork, then shred with
your immersion blender.

1 tablespoon low sodium soy sauce
1/2 jalapeno or habanero, diced
6 cloves garlic, diced
2 bell peppers, diced
1/2 cup fresh cilantro
1 onion, sliced
2 teaspoons chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin


The directions for this are ridiculously easy.  Put your beef in your crockpot.  Dump everything in on top.  Set it for 4-6 hours on low and walk away.

At some point, I recommend the 4 hour mark, you will use your fork to break your steak meat up into chunks.  Then whip out your trusty immersion blender and pulse it a few times so that your meat "shreds" easily.  I then let it cook on low another 2 hours.  But if you're gone all day, it's totally fine to just shred the meat right before serving.

See- how easy is that?!?


Full disclosure folks- I adapted this recipe from one that I found from one of my FAVORITE food inspirations, 100 Days of Real Food.  I followed Ms. Lisa Leake's recipe exactly and found it to be too salty and too spicy for my family's personal tastes.  I've adapted it just a bit but I wanted to give full credit to her for this original which I based my recipe from.