Saturday, March 12, 2016

Friend Requests Spell TROUBLE

I am TERRIFIED every time one of the kiddo's friend's Mom finds my personal Facebook page and sends me a friend request.  Especially if they homeschool.

While it is NEVER my intention to offend anyone, on either of my pages...well, my own personal page is just that- it's mine.  It's for fun and silly meme's and swearing with girlfriends if I so choose.  It's dedicated to my love for vodka and curse words and occasionally I might include a photo of the family.  Maybe.  I tend to not post personal, introspective stuff here so it is very much all about the surface.  It's a one dimensional view of who I am but certainly NOT the whole part of me.

So can you just imagine when someone who doesn't know ME all that well stumbles upon this business?!?

I'm afraid that they will judge the surface and forget all the good conversations we've had.  I'm afraid they won't allow our children to be friends anymore.  But do I stop being me?  Do I restrict who I am so that I don't offend or upset anyone?

Fuck no.

Truthfully, I struggle with this.  I have a VERY public page and persona.  Yes, this is 100% me.  I am as open and honest as I can be while travelling this journey of homeschooling, marriage and motherhood.  As a result, it is very easy for new acquaintances to find me and get a glimpse of our life as a family.  However, this is just a piece of me.  There is also a very private side that enjoys a good vodka and lemonade and likes to say bad words.  Usually when my kid isn't present praise Jesus.

It's all me.  Just as you all have lots of different facets to your life and your personality.  But if someone new were to see just a tiny portion of it- would this change how they ultimately view you?  Probably so.

Let me also be clear and tell you all that I truly don't care what others think of me.  If I did, I probably wouldn't share half the stuff with you all that I do.  But I do care about my kid.  And when other parents wrongly judge me, they also judge my child.  And this sucks.  Balls.

So I still struggle with this.  I want to be myself and I want to have authentic relationships with people but I also don't wish to walk around offending everyone.  There is a time and place for everything after all...and I get this.

How do we proceed?  Do we simply NOT accept any new friend requests?  Do we not share little bits of ourselves?  Do we keep everything hidden and private?

Gah!  That just sounds like no fun to me.

For now I've decided to accept the new friend's on my personal page.  I still THINK before I post anything but I am also not limiting who I am.  If you're my "friend", you are simply going to get an inside view into a little piece of me.  But please remember- this is just a small portion of who I am, not the entire piece.  In turn, I will also try to keep this in mind when I view your Facebook.  Because goodness- you're weird too!  We all are and that's the beauty of it all!

Happy Friending Y'all!

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