I love all the things about not just my phone, but my Ipad as well. Whether I'm popping in to Facebook to check my newsfeed, sharing a funny homeschool Meme, surfing Pinterest for vegan recipes, online dreaming over at Torrid, reading a sexy book on my Kindle app for my book club- I simply LOVE my electronic devices.
But then it became a problem.
I didn't realize it at first of course. I was just thumbing through Facebook while driving in the car with the husband or reading a book while he was watching something on TV I didn't want to watch. We were still together, sharing the same space so I thought we were good.
We were not.
Yes, I was there physically, but I had allowed outside distractions to take away from my time with my family. So much so that they were beginning to not only notice but comment A LOT on my distractions.
I will tell you all that at first, well- shit. At first I thought that it wasn't so bad. I kinda still feel that way, like my boys were over exaggerating my involvement in my phone and Ipad. They are glued to theirs as well, so I figured it all evened out. I was not taking responsibility for my own actions but rather looking at other's actions in order to justify my own.
Wow.
The husband and I talked this out one night. I mentioned to him that he was knee deep in his tablet in the evenings as well and we had a bit of a go around about this. Neither one of us willing to just admit our faults.
Meh. Not a good look for a marriage y'all.
We talked again after the New Year and made a pact. One that we had sort of, kinda, maybe...attempted to do before but this time, with renewed understanding and desire to succeed.
No more phones or tablets in the bedroom.No more you guys.
The details of this can be a bit tricky. Especially if you've got sick family members you are responsible for who like to call at all hours and you use your phone as your alarm clock. But here it is- once we hit the bedroom, this is SACRED SPACE.
Facebook has NO place in the bedroom.
Our cell phones are there, sitting on the nightstands. For emergency purposes and so we aren't late for work and get fired purposes. But this is it. We do NOT browse around social media, we do NOT conduct our online shopping, we are NOT texting friends- none of it because our time as a married couple is WAY more important than anything anyone could post on Facebook.
My marriage matters more than your cat video.
Since putting away the electronics, our marriage has personally seen a great uplift. We are cuddling more, have more intimate time, focusing on the words and messages- actually listening more to each other. It has truly been a great blessing and we are only five days into the new year.
In addition, I have personally been putting away my devices more. You may have noticed that in the last six months, I've been posting less over on the Facebook page. Trust me- I have. I have been blogging less and just taking more time to be PRESENT with my family. I have renewed this personal goal and I am striving to maintain a balance between something I really enjoy versus something I love beyond measure.
While social media and electronics are most assuredly a great thing- they have a time and a place. As a busy Wife and Mom, I should legit be able to have a few outside hobbies and interests. Facebook is simply one of them and so I won't be giving it up completely. I get to have nice things, things that I enjoy, things that bring me happiness. I deserve that. But I will be pushing for balance and putting the important things first.
So yes- my name is Chrissie and I'm addicted to my phone.
But I'm working on it and I encourage all of you to do the same. I promise it will bring great things to your marriage.
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