This month marks fifteen years with the husband. FIFTEEN YEARS. So Wow, that's kinda big.
We've officially been married for 11.5 of those 15 years- because hey, that half a year is super important right! There's so many things that I've learned in this time with my man and you just know I'm going to share it with you all here!
#1-
We are stronger together.
Like, for reals. He's my person and I need him. It's OK to just admit that- I need my man. I need him by my side when I walk into a room full of strangers. He needs me to navigate so he can focus on driving. I need him to be a strong Father to our son, he needs me to nurture and mother.
But the other part to this is that not only do we need each other- we are better when we are together. Sure, we are pretty kick ass rocking the single checkout lane but put us together and we are simply unstoppable. We are a team, in all ways.
#2-
What it feels like to love and to be loved.
The love from a parent or other family member is completely different than the love of a spouse or a partner. This person can at any moment leave- they are NOT obligated to love you but rather choose you. Above everyone else, they choose you. Over and over, day in and day out- THEY. CHOOSE. YOU.
#3-
The knowledge that this man will ALWAYS have my back.
It might be quiet and steady and other times its fierce in its protection and shelter. He might tolerate you because he has to, he might be cordial or downright rude- this man does what he needs to do. He guards my heart just as he protects my body- with his own.
#4-
It takes a strong man to love a strong woman.
Marriage is hard, like seriously HARD. To be a strong leader and head of the household takes amazing strength of character. Just as allowing someone else to lead is a great lesson in humility, grace and love.
When both people are strong willed, stubborn and fiercely opinionated- it takes work to make it work. To ebb and flow so that at times one person can lead while one can follow.
#5-
To see someone's darkness, to share your own & to still love unconditionally.
To be vulnerable and to still be loved, faults and all- is simply the greatest gift of all. To lay yourself open for another being and to trust them with your deepest weaknesses and be rewarded with their love- it's just life changing.
Putting aside your fears and insecurities and being present and real. To show someone that quiet you, that resides softly in your soul and to have them say, "I love you just as you are"- words can't even describe it.
#6-
What it feels like to have a forever friend.
The husband and I are best friends. For over fifteen years I have shared, laughed, loved, cried with him by my side. To know that I will always have that is truly a special thing. To have the greatest friend in your corner- cheering you on, calling you on your bullshit, making you laugh, sharing a drink, venting about crappy people...yeah, it's good stuff.
To have this for a lifetime- wow.
#7-
Patience.
So yeah. 'Nuff said.
#8-
How to truly forgive and how to ask for forgiveness.
It's said that those we are closest to have the power to hurt us the most. We all know this is true of any marriage. When you share a life together, it will get messy. It's not all rainbows and glitter- life is yucky sometimes. Being a good partner means you're willing to admit when you've done wrong. Being an even better partner means you are quick to forgive- like, REALLY forgive.
Quit holding on to the bitterness. Let go of the anger. Give your person grace and understanding and say, "I forgive you."
#9-
That love is in the everyday.
Sure, grand gestures are great. Who wouldn't love that shit? But love shows up in the everyday. When I make the husband's lunch or he brings me up a bowl of ice cream at night. A sweet flirty text to let him know I'm thinking of him or when he watches a chick flick on the Netflix with me. It's there. Everyday. Showing up.
Don't take your love for granted. Most people can spend a lifetime searching for this forever kind of love and you've found it. So recognize that sometimes love comes in softly and that sometimes that's even better then the big and the grand.
#10-
Normal is overrated.
You might be shocked to hear this but NOTHING and I do mean, nothing about the husband and I could ever be called "normal". We are not normal people. We don't follow a normal life. We do things differently. Always have, always will. And yet- despite what people thought about us, here we are 15 years later, proving that you don't need normal to have a successful marriage.
Look us- succeeding and shit. Dearest Naysayers, tell me again what marriage number you're on again? Exactly....normal is boring. Love is what matters.
Fifteen gorgeous years. It's truly been an honor to be called his WIFE.
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