Tips For Food Shopping

It seems like every where you turn nowadays you are being told that something you're eating is "bad" for you.

Arsenic in your rice, fake foods, pink slime, the addition of carrageenan, some weird "thing" moving in your chicken nugget, bleach in your garlic....on an on the list goes.  Frankly, it's intimidating.  How does a normal Mom go about feeding her family foods that aren't going to poison them?

Ugh.

It's SO overwhelming that at times you simply want to throw up your hands and scream, "I GIVE UP!"  But we all know that you can't give up because food is life and you want your family to live a long and healthy life.  Since we've been on our food journey for awhile now (almost 7 years actually!) I've learned a few things.  And you just know that I want to share with all of you!

Below are a few tips on how I personally go about buying food for my family.  Since I do 99% of the food shopping, I don't have to worry about anything "toxic" coming in to my house. So let's go- here's my tips for a busy Mama looking to feed her family only the very best!



Shop the outer isle's.

I know, I know...we've all heard this one.  But it's SO true!  In every single grocery store, the inner isles contain the crap.  Sorry but it's true.  In fact, almost all the "good" stuff will be found on one side of the grocery store and you guessed it- it's on the farthest outer isle.  Stay away from those inside isle's Mama's!  They hold the chips, sodas, canned soups, packaged cookies, crackers, frozen meals, boxed dinners and other toxic junk.  The exception to this is a very few organic canned and boxed items.  Things like dry pasta, canned tomatoes, lentils etc.

Above is a simplified version of a typical grocery store layout- of course your individual store's floor plan may be just a bit different.  This is pretty similar to how my own store looks and for the most part, I keep to the outer perimeter.  I also tend to stay mainly on the right and back side of the store and only go near the bakery because that's where they keep the liquor!

If you do find yourself wandering down those center isle's...because, hey! that's where all the ice cream is...please make sure you are doing due diligence and reading those labels!

The rule of 5.

When it comes time to read those labels, keep in mind the rule of 5.  It's really very simple- you want to try to limit your processed foods to only five ingredients.  If you can't keep it to five, then take a close look at the first couple of ingredients.

Here's a PERFECT example of when reading those labels really makes a huge difference.  The first photo below is of the label for Ore Ida's Golden Fries.  Notice the ingredients list, the first two aren't so bad but then it goes all sorts of wrong.

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size:	84g
Amount Per Serving
Calories	130	Calories From Fat	30
% Daily Value *
Total Fat	3 1/2g		5%
Saturated Fat	1g		5%
Trans Fat	0g
Cholesterol	0mg		0%
Sodium	290mg		13%
Potassium	390mg		10%
Carbs	21g		7%
Dietary Fiber	2g		8%
Sugars	1g
Protein	2g
Vitamin A			0%
Vitamin C			6%
Calcium			0%
Iron			2%
* The Percent Daily Values are based on a 2,000 calorie diet, so your values may change depending on your calorie needs. The values here may not be 100% accurate because the recipes have not been professionally evaluated nor have they been evaluated by the U.S. FDA.
INGREDIENTS: POTATOES, VEGETABLE OIL (SUNFLOWER, COTTONSEED, SOYBEAN, AND/OR CANOLA), SALT, DEXTROSE, DISODIUM DIHYDROGEN PYROPHOSPHATE, ANNATTO (VEGETABLE COLOR).

Let's compare that to Alexia's House Cut Fries in the image below.  Five ingredients- all of which you can not only pronounce but you can recognize.  These two products are almost identical in appearance and price wise they are very comparable.  So tell me- why wouldn't you buy the 2nd option?

House Cut Fries with Sea Salt

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 84 g

Amount Per Serving

Calories 130

 % Daily Value*

Total Fat 3.5g5%

Saturated Fat 0g0%

Trans Fat 0g

Cholesterol 0mg0%

Sodium 200mg8%

Potassium 410mg12%

Total Carbohydrates 23g8%

Dietary Fiber 2g8%

Sugars Less Than 1g

Protein 2g

Vitamin A0%

Vitamin C6%

Calcium0%

Iron2%

Ingredients: POTATOES, CANOLA OIL, SEA SALT, APPLE JUICE CONCENTRATE (TO PROMOTE BROWNING), CITRIC ACID (TO PROMOTE COLOR RETENTION).

Only buy what you know.


That brings me to the next thing on the list.  Only buy what you know, what you recognize as food.

Go back to that first image of the Ore-Ida french fries.  What in the ever lovin' world is disodium dihydrogen and pyrophosphate?  And why is it in something so simple as french fries?  Now this is the real question mmkay...

My advice here is to change the way you read labels.  Become very decisive and allow NO room for anything you don't immediately recognize.  Here's how it goes down in my house-

Kiddo- Mom, can I get this?

Me- Read me the ingredients.

Kiddo- Aww....Mom.


Many a times you'll see me consulting the Google while standing in the middle of the grocery store.  As a busy Mom, I have to decide if allowing my child to consume citric acid and canola oil in the convenient bag of frozen Alexia fries is worth the time saved.  Or would I rather he not eat these products and so I'll simply take the added time and them myself.  When in doubt, opt out.



Shop your community.


Along the same lines as buying what you know and recognize, it's also very important to buy from people you know.  That means local farmers!  Not only will you be supporting a local family but you'll be putting that money back into your community.  And you will know exactly what you're buying.  It truly doesn't get any better than this!

Whenever possible, I encourage you to shop with local farmers instead of shopping at the grocery store.  Yes, for many of us- this will be more difficult and most likely more time consuming.  I get it.

Throughout the years, I've found some super simple ways to do this.  A CSA is a great option, as are co-ops and farmer's markets.  I also encourage you to look into local, organic delivery services and consider purchasing your meat from a local farmer.  Check out this website to see what's in your area.

A few staples that I always buy locally are honey, meat and eggs.  I am also buying more of our dairy locally and we shop quite a bit in season and are able to purchase local fruits and veggies at a small stand near our home and the summer farmer's markets.  It will take time as you figure out a way to incorporate this into your lifestyle.  However the minute you hear of a massive, national recall on bagged spinach- you'll understand exactly why you do this.  Knowing where your food comes from, how it's been grown, who has handled it- there's a wonderful piece of mind and sense of community that comes from this.



Go organic!

If you have a choice- always go organic.  Yes, it costs more but food without chemicals and toxins is totally worth it in my opinion.  Don't forget that you're also making many more things at home from scratch- so there will be some cost savings with this. For many of us, the added expense of organic food is balanced by the savings of cooking primarily at home.

Here's a few things I always buy organic:

Potatoes
Berries
Apples
Bananas
Salad/Lettuce Mix
Dairy- this includes yogurt, milk, cream, ice cream, cheese, cream cheese and sour cream
Meat
Orange Juice
Rice
Condiments- ketchup, mustard, mayo & salad dressing


And to help you get started, consult the Dirty Dozen and the Clean 15.  This will help you in deciding where to spend your grocery budget.  Psst....I bet you didn't know that potatoes and strawberries were some of the WORST pesticide laden foods!  I sure was shocked when I heard this!  Knowledge is power and the more you know, the better and easier it will be to feed your family.

Eat food that dies.


Your first priority should always be to try to eat foods from the earth whenever possible.  Meaning- real food that comes from dirt ie. the earth.  If it was made in a factory or processing plant- stay far, far away.

You want to eat food that will rot and spoil.  Seriously- just stop a moment and think about it.  When you reach for that bag of Doritos or nuke a Hot Pocket- what happens to it inside your body?  How does this differ when you snack on some almonds or slice up an apple?

Your body is a tool, a vessel if you will and you need to give it the right fuel in order for it to run as it should.  When you weigh it down with chemicals and artificial ingredients, it has a hard time starting up and will inevitably shut down.  It just will.

So when you're shopping- try to fill your cart with items that were once in the dirt.  It's really that simple.  If you're following the very first rule, shopping the outer isle's, this really won't be too hard.


Buy ingredients.

For the love of all that's holy- when did we STOP cooking?!?  There's absolutely no reason you need to give up your favorite foods.  We love pizza and cheeseburgers at my house mmkay...and macaroni and cheese- yes please!  But I don't buy this stuff anymore- I buy the ingredients to make it myself.  And this will simply make all the difference.

Even if you're buying organic convenience foods- they are still going to contain additives.  Organic does NOT equal healthy.  So simply learn how to make your favorite dishes yourself, at home, in your own kitchen.  This way you know exactly what it is that dish and you can tailor it to fit your family's tastes and health.




So WOW.  That's a lot of information.  My advice to you is simple- give yourself plenty of time to figure this out and then do what works best for you.  Everyone will be different.  We all have different budgets and ideas on what it "healthy" and what is not and there's nothing wrong with that. There is really no "right" way to do this- just a strong desire to eat better and feed your children a diet that will sustain them for a nice long life.

With that being said, I'm sure you might be just a bit curious on where exactly I shop.
  

Here's what I am currently doing-

• We get an organic, local delivery from Full Circle about every 3 weeks. While the bulk of this is local produce, I can also add on grocery items made by those in my region.  This is where I find my local milk, yogurt and cream.  If you don't live in the country, it can be rough trying to get your hands on local dairy and animal products. I can also add on meat, pantry items, specialty items and so on.  
• Our meat comes from a local farm.  I was ordering online and arranging for a free pickup but now I'm able to find this same meat in a local specialty grocery store.  I can also add it to my CSA delivery when needed.  If you're having trouble finding a local farmer, check out a farmer's markets or try looking online.
• Every week or two weeks I shop at the local produce stand.  Here I buy in season fruits and vegetables that were grown within a 5 mile radius.  I also purchase local honey and eggs from them and the best part- they are open year round!!!  Psst....they also gave me a special card to save 10% every time I shop.  So while you can't use coupons or grocery store savings at little stands like this, many times they will have some sort of savings/incentive for repeat customers, just ask!
• Approximately every 2 months I shop at Costco to stock up on baking and canned goods.  I buy organic sugar, organic flour, organic coffee, organic canned beans and organic canned tomatoes here.  And if they have it- I will also purchase some organic fruits because the price is so darn cheap!  Oh- and vitamins.  Wait...and liquor too!
• Each week finds me at our neighborhood Safeway grocery store.  I buy everything else here- produce that wasn't available through our CSA or at the local stand, orange juice, cheese (I haven't found a good local cheese yet!), ice cream, occasionally some Applegate products like hot dogs or lunch meat, oatmeal, dry pasta etc.

This is what's working for me right now.  It took me a LONG time to get to this point.  So please don't feel overwhelmed, just start with one area that you know you can improve and set about doing it.  For me, this was animal products.  It's my desire for all our meat and dairy to be local and for the most part- it is.  But please know that it took me almost 5 years to get here.  So give yourself grace and know that it's very much a work in progress!  You can do this, I know you can!

Want to read more?

• Grocery Shopping 101
• 10 Tips to Encourage Your Kids to Eat Well
• We Are Flexitarians!
• Down With GMO's

It's Summertime!

Ah- summer.  Riding around the neighborhood on your pink two-wheeler, traipsing through the trees, jumping in the sprinkler.....such great memories.  But seriously- I don't know how my Mom maintained her sanity, especially considering she doesn't drink.  Say wha?!?  With three children very close in age and a solid two months off from public school- activities were a must.  Girl scout camps, swimming lessons, Disneyland, visiting family, art classes at the local fabric store- yeah, we did some pretty fun things in the summer time.

And you just know I'm going to do my best to give my own child the same great summer memories that I had growing up.  I'm also a planner and a bit OCD so you know I've got this down to a science- a science people!  My goal is to allow the kiddo plenty of summer free time with a few structured activities in there to break up the monotony.

Today I'm going to share with you what we are doing this summer.  This is targeted at the 10 year old boy crowd (because that's what I have mmkay) but you can adjust as needed.

We begin by kicking of our summer with Field Day at the kiddo's homeschool program.  This is always a day long event the very first week of June and includes a live DJ, bouncy houses, a dance, food, carnival games, cotton candy, face painting, tie dying, friends and other fun stuff.  It's a jam packed loaded day of AWESOME.

I have several local sources when pulling cheap or free learning activities for the kiddo.  They are the two closest libraries, the YMCA, the Lego store at the mall, dollar movies at Regal Cinemas, local parks, museums, FREE bowling and FREE baseball game tickets and the local indoor water park/recreation center.

I highly recommend you stop in at your local YMCA to see what programs they offer for summertime.  This time of year is when they really excel and we love taking advantage of all they have to offer.  This year the kiddo will be participating in the Slice of Summer program.  It's FREE to members and it runs Monday through Friday from 1:30-3:30pm as a drop in program.  They play fun games outside or in the gym and it's a great way for your kids to make new friends and get some exercise.  Oh- and at my YMCA branch, the parents can drop off.  Mama's- did you hear that?!?  You can have 2 free hours in the afternoon ALL TO YOURSELF.  Sign me up!

In addition to the Slice of Summer, the kiddo will be doing two different camps.  The husband and I have strict rules when it comes to camp- no away, no overnight, no full day and we must know the camp leaders.  Yeah, you could say we are a bit overprotective.  Thankfully, this year they have half day camps held at the local campus and we know EVERYONE there!  The first one is a Lego themed one- right up the kiddo's alley!  The second is called Map It and it's about navigation, treasure hunting, solving mysteries etc.  Each camp runs for one week and is from 9am to 12:30pm.  Perfection!  Cost is just $25 per day or $100 for the week.  And since I'm super smart, I planned one for mid June and the second one for mid August to give the kiddo something fun to look forward to.

Of course the kiddo will also be spending quite a bit of time just hanging out at the YMCA.  It's kinda his home away from home.  With open swim times, open gym and a youth center- there's lots of spaces for him to hang out with friends in a supervised and active environment.  For those of you that aren't YMCA members- you can purchase a day pass for just $5 per person.  So if you're wanting to take the family for a day of air conditioned fun, this is a fairly cheap way to do it!

Alright, after the YMCA, the local libraries are where it's at!  They offer a Summer Program for school aged kids and I have to say that ours are pretty impressive.  They bring in fun performers and experts in the field- like the Reptile Man and they have themed events with crafts and games.  While some of these can be a bit on the "young" side, for the most part- the kiddo still enjoys them.  This year they are doing a fun evening of Mad Science with dry ice storms, balls floating on air, burp potion- seriously some great stuff for kids of all ages!  The will also have local legends and stories, animal heroes, Lego clubs, Minecraft building competitions, duct tape crafts, superhero movie marathons and more.  And the best part of all- it's completely FREE.

My tip is to check with the libraries closest to you, especially if they are within different library systems.  We are fortunate to have 3 to choose from and between them all, there's something fun and free to do several times per week.

While you're there don't forget to check out the Summer Reading program.  Each year the kiddo meticulous keeps track of his reading so he can enter to win a new bike.  This year he's decided he wants to read 10,000 pages.  Let's do it!

Other ideas for summer include the $1 movies offered by Regal Cinemas- yes, they are really just $1 per person.  There's also FREE summer bowling daily, although you do have to pay for adults and shoe rentals.  Don't forget to register with Lowes or Home Depot for FREE building clinics for kids!  Local craft stores offer weekly crafting classes for $2 for kids.  There's lots of programs and ways to get FREE minor league baseball tickets- our library gives them away each year.  The Lego store at our local mall offers a FREE building clinic on the first Tuesday of each month and yes, you do get to keep what you build!  They also have monthly Club meetings and lots of contests and ways to get FREE Legos.  Stop by the store and grab a calendar!

In addition to all this great stuff there's also your local museums, many of which will offer FREE days during the summertime.  Don't forget to check out all the great parks near you as well!  We try to find a new park to visit every couple of weeks- it's a great way to teach your children some very useful life skills (like how to find your way home when lost) and it's fun to find something new in your own neighborhood!

We cap of our summer fun with a long weekend away in September once all the public schoolers are back in the classroom.  We try to go somewhere we've never been before (hello great learning opportunity!) and usually invite friends along for the fun!  Unfortunately, due to the nature of the husband's job, we simply aren't able to take a longer vacation.  Summer is his busy season....BOO.  But we do make up for it with plenty of fun activities.

So...are you just a bit overwhelmed with all this info coming at you?  I know I would be....so here's what I want you to take away from the above.


My Goals for Summer

• Have a planned activity for each day.  Even if it's just going to find a new park and get an ice cream- something to do each day will keep the boredom away.
• Leave plenty of time for free play.  Even though we have a daily planned activity, it does NOT take up the entire day.  After school work is done, the rest of the day is open for free play.
• Mix the bigger activities/events in with the smaller.  This will give you some variety.  For example, don't schedule three weeks of camp back to back.  Try to do one each month instead.
• Encourage active play.  Our summer is NOT spent in front of the electronics.  
• Ask your kids for their input.  Find out what they want to do this summer and see if you can make it happen.  The kiddo is ALL about the Legos right now and while his wish is to go to Legoland in Florida, that simply isn't going to happen.  But I did find plenty of Lego events- camp, builds, contests etc to keep him happy.
• Be flexible.  We have a goal for each day.  Schoolwork, planned activity, fun.  That's it.  But as all Mama's know, sometimes even accomplishing a small amount is difficult.  So remember your goal as you begin your day but don't stress if you can't make it to the planned activity or your kid wants to ride bikes all day instead of going to the museum.  It is summer after all....
• Leave one day completely free.  Summer is all about hot, lazy days spent playing outside with friends.  Give your children this gift.

Want to read more about Summertime fun?

• Summer Homeschooling
• Gearing Up for Summer
• The Summer Schedule

Love Is In The Little Things

The husband got off work super early today and wouldn't you know it- I had to work tonight!  Boo.  Why is it that whenever he's home, I'm not?  Or at least it can seem that way sometimes....

He was upstairs while I was downstairs frantically making my dinner for work, prepping dinner for the husband and kiddo and packing his lunch for tomorrow.  Working until midnight simply means that I'm NOT going to be dragging my behind out of bed early the next morning.

All too soon it was time for me to leave for work.  I spent several minutes searching for my car keys and finally gave up, calling out to the husband, "Babe, I can't find my keys.  Can I just borrow yours so I'm not late for work?"  And it was then that he told me he had them all along.  Stinker.  That certainly would have been nice to know five minutes ago mmkay...

I grabbed my purse, my dinner, my blueberry smoothie and I headed out the door.  Stopping dead when the kiddo said-

"Mom, we washed your car for you.  Dad turned it on to get cold since it's so hot out today."

Sometimes we have moments that are simply good.  So good you wonder if they belong to you.  Now I fully realize most people won't see what the big deal is with this- but it really is, it truly, honestly is...

Love is in the little things.

We show people in our lives how we love them.  Our kindness, our service is proof of our love for them.  As a traditional wife, I am very used to doing for others.  I serve my family because I love them.  I don't expect anything in return as their happiness and comfort is truly my priority.  But I'm not gonna lie- it sure does feel awesome when it's appreciated.  And to have it returned to you....ladies, this is SIMPLY THE BEST.

Today my boys showed me how much they love me.  They did something thoughtful, kind and completely unexpected for me simply because they knew I would love it.  Gestures so small that over time add up to a life bursting with love.

So the next time you diligently pack lunches for your family, cut your children's hair, wash and fold the clothes, bake them their favorite dessert- remember that it's more then chores.  It's love.  It adds up.  It's worth it.  Love is in the little things.

Cake or Pie?

The other day I whipped up a chocolate cake from scratch, you know- because I got skillz, and the family ate it in 24 hours.  Seriously, the cake was gone in less than a day.  And as the kiddo was

commiserating with the husband over the last slice being gone, the husband said- "don't worry, Mom will make us more."

True Story.

So last night, the husband and I were canoodling in bed and I asked him if he really wanted another chocolate cake.  "How about pie instead?" I said.  Turns out the husband always wants cake and he always wants pie.  Tell me something I don't know mmkay....

Me- Well which one would you prefer?

Husband- Both.

Me- But if I had to make only one.....

Husband- Both.

Me- You're such a butt.

Husband- That's why you love me.  And now you're probably gonna make me both just out of spite.

Me- Well der.

So that's how I found myself making another chocolate cake this week AND baking an apple pie.  Because my man couldn't decide which one he wanted more and so I made him both.

In all seriousness- this moment speaks to the kind of Wife and Mother that I aspire to be.  I want my family to know that I will ALWAYS be there to bake another chocolate cake.  And when they are being silly and can't decide between cake and pie- I'll make them both, because that's just how much I love them.

Baking is love.  Cake is love.  Pie is love.  It's the time you take to do something sweet for those you cherish.  It's showing them, literally showing them, that they are worth your time.  It might sound ridiculous to some- but this quiet and silly little moment, speaks to the heart of a housewife.  She does for others and she does it will all her might.

Want to read more about being a Wife and Mother?

• So You Call Yourself a Housewife
• A Morning Checklist for Traditional Wives
• Update: The Good Wife's Guide

I am FIRED UP- the sequel

Yesterday I posted about a situation that had occurred with kiddo and one of his teacher's at his homeschool program.  Today, I'm going to tell you about the phone call and the subsequent conversations with the kiddo and husband.

Here's what was posted over on the Facebook page yesterday.

You guys- I am FIRED UP!!!

Here's the situation-

The kiddo takes a math class at our local homeschool program. This math class supplements his home learning. He's struggled with the teacher & has felt that she unfairly singles him out. He's also felt that other kids are making fun of him & when he stands up for himself, he gets in trouble but not the offenders.

Basically- he's feeling disrespected & NOT supported by the teacher.

We've talked with the kiddo about the entire situation. We as parents acknowledge that sometimes kids & teachers will not always "mesh" but that a teacher is still someone to be respected. They are simply doing the very best they can. We LOVE teachers in this home mmkay...So, we have chosen to use this as a life lesson for the kiddo & trusted him to tell us when something went wrong. I will also add that we trusted the teacher to reach out to us as parents if she was having difficulty- she has not.

With that being said, today pushed me over the edge. The kiddo came to me after class & said the teacher embarrassed him & pulled him outside during class. He was sitting with some friends & these boys were becoming an issue & started swearing & saying inappropriate things.

You guys- these boys are 10-12 years old. I expect a certain amount of this to occur. The kiddo tells me that while he was sitting with them & participating in some of the conversation, he was not swearing. Now- I'm not so naive to believe that my child is 100% innocent but when he tells me that he honestly didn't do something- I BELIEVE HIM. This is a Mother's job, right? And I know that my child doesn't not lie. Anyone who knows him IRL, knows that he is embarrassingly honest- lying is simply not part of his DNA.

So the teacher pulls him outside & accuses him of swearing & behaving inappropriately. She does NOT do this with the students who actually did the offense. He told her he didn't do this but she continued. Rather than argue with someone who he's been told he needs to respect- he simply apologized & went back in to class.

This situation backs up everything that the kiddo has been telling me throughout the entire year. I feel like I failed my child. I should have done more for him with this teacher. He clearly needed assistance in dealing with her & I didn't listen & respect what he was telling me. I chose to place my faith & trust in this woman to do right by my child. I was wrong.

So....I have sent the teacher an email & asked her to call me at her earliest convenience today. My plan is to simply ask her what happened, tell her that I believe my child was being honest when he said he didn't do this & tell her that she owes him an apology. Oh- and I expect this not to happen again.

Am I over reacting? Because, well....I know you'll find this hard to believe but sometimes I can be a bit "dramatic". What would you do in this situation?

And here's what happened after.

I emailed the teacher again after dinner because I had yet to hear from her all day.  I was upset gosh darn it and I wanted to discuss it immediately.  Yeah- patience is SO not my thing!  She returned my call while we were at Karate at the YMCA, so I stepped outside so I could speak privately with her.

You guys- you'll be so impressed.  I was such an adult about this and simply asked her what had happened yesterday in class.  BTW- I was NOT happy that she had pulled my child out to speak with him privately and never thought to inform the parents about this incident.  But I digress...

Here's what she had to say-

She heard William say "Mother Fucker" when speaking with a group of boys at his table.  She informed me that on Monday there was a guest teacher and that she had left notes and had observed William's table swearing and behaving inappropriately.  As a result, his teacher stated that she was extra sensitive in listening and observing them the next class time.  She said that she pulled him out and told him that was inappropriate and that he apologized. She also stated that she has "never in her entire career had to pull a child outside the classroom for such inappropriate behavior and harsh words".

Ok.....to say that I was surprised to hear this was an understatement.  I fully realize that my child can act out and is not a perfect angel.  Yeah- I'm aware.  But this word, this "F" word- it simply isn't something he says.  When he's really pushing the boundaries, the worst he'll say is "crap" to which he immediately gets reprimanded.  The "F" word, is simply not something he says.

I asked her a few questions.  Did you physically see William swear?  She did not.  So basically, it's possible you heard one of the other boys and immediately jumped on William as the culprit.  William said that it was the other boys at his table that were swearing- why did you not take them outside as well?  Did William admit to doing this?  Her answer- no but he apologized.

I ended the phone conversation by stating that William had struggled with her as a teacher the entire year but that I had assumed it was just normal stuff.  Math isn't his favorite subject and this year there were LOTS of new, harder concepts so I just assumed it was the content he was struggling with and since she was the unlucky one to help deliver it- she was the recipient of his angst.  She stated that she didn't feel it was that bad for him in class, which is why she never reached out to me, and that she thought things were getting better between them and that he was vastly improved.  Yeah- a whole different story that what I was hearing.

I apologized to her for his behavior, thanked her for the phone call and asked her to reach out to me if anything else occurred in the future.  Wow- I'm so proud of my adult self!  And the Mama Bear in me was very much restrained- GO ME!

Later that night, when we got home, the husband and I spoke with the kiddo.  I relayed the information to him and asked him to think on how I could be getting a much different story from his teacher.

Here's what the kiddo had to say:

On Monday (with the guest teacher) he was whispering to the boys at his table about what someone from Clash of Clans called him.  You might remember...we banned this game recently because of the inappropriate language and the online chat content.  He spelled it out for me because it didn't want to say the word.  F-U-C-L-E-R.  "Maybe this is how the teacher thought I said that other word Mom.  But that's all I said and that was on Monday.  I never even said any bad words or did anything yesterday when my teacher was there."  Hmm....

So I asked him exactly what happened on Wednesday during class time.  He said that he was sitting at his table and talking with his friends and his teacher walked right up to him and said that his behavior was completely inappropriate and said "come here" and motioned him outside.  He said one of his friends said "crap" but that was it.

Two different stories.  One from my child- who I know.  One from a teacher- who I'm supposed to trust.  What's a Mama to do?

We sent the kiddo to bed by telling him that we believed what he was saying to us but regardless- he was still saying words close to bad words and perhaps not staying as on task in the classroom as he should be doing.  I'm pretty sure he was taking full advantage of having a guest teacher in the classroom....We told him we expected improvement in this area.

The husband and I reached a conclusion.  Something clearly wasn't adding up here.  My Mama gut instinct was telling me that the kiddo was right all along.  This teacher had, for some reason, singled him out.  Why else would she take only him outside the classroom and not any of the other boys?!?  BUT- and here's the real issue....I believe that his teacher read the notes from the guest teacher and came after William the first chance she got.  I do not believe for one minute that she heard my child say Mother Fucker.  This is not something he says, it's just not.  She clearly had no intention to inform me of what had happened and when I literally called her on it, she was forced to make something up to cover her behind.

The kiddo told me that he apologized to her because he didn't want to incur any more of her wrath.  While I think he may be a bit dramatic here, I do think that his feelings were valid.  He kept asking me, "what can I do Mom? She's a teacher and I'm just a kid."

Here's what we told the kiddo-

Always apologize if you are in the wrong.  Always.

You do not have to take the blame for something you didn't do.

It's OK to question teachers and other adults, even those in authority.

Children have rights too.  You have the right to ask specifically what it is that you did wrong.  You have the right to say you don't agree and you have the right to ask for your parent to be present and called.


I am still very much FIRED UP!  I believe my child.  I am sure he did or said something out of line on Monday when there was a guest teacher but I do not believe that he said the "F" word in front of his teacher on Wednesday.  I am proud of him for telling me right after it happened.  I am disappointed in his teacher that she didn't feel this was important enough to reach out to me.  I am also pretty certain that his teacher is not being honest- which is of course extremely sad as she's in a position of role model for these children.

Bottom line- there's one month left of classes.  We will encourage the kiddo to continue with his obligations because that's what we do.  However, we will be closely watching and the husband has said he will sit in on a few classes.  Nothing like a 6'2 bear of a man to dissuade any poor behavior mmkay....We have instructed the kiddo that one of the boys at his table is a bad influence and he agrees- he will no longer be sitting with this boy.  But most importantly- the trust with this teacher is lost.  I would like to believe in the good in people and so I'm hoping that this is just a situation of misunderstanding all around.  I don't believe there's any negative intentions on the teacher's part but the fact remains, her story isn't adding up.  At the end of the day, a Mother should always believe in her child.  Period.  I will no longer be signing the kiddo up for any of her classes.

Done and done.

So You Call Yourself a Homemaker

Homemaker, not home-WRECKER.  BWHAHAHAHA!

But seriously, how many people actually refer to themselves this way anymore?  Slim to none, am I right?  A mere half century ago and pretty much all Wives and Mothers were homemakers.  Crazy how fast times can really change!

While I most definitely consider myself to be a homemaker, I do not typically refer to myself this way.  At least out loud.....I can just imagine the horrified stares of all the "liberated" women now.  Hmm...I wonder what would happen if I threw caution to the wind and just called myself a housewife instead?  Ha!  Blasphemy I'm sure!

In the interest of fun, I've put together a little list to help you sort yourselves out.  You're welcome!

You Might Be a Homemaker If:

• You post things to Facebook such as, "how do I get the yellow stains out of my pillows?" and "feels SO good to steam clean the carpets, 2 months is far too long!"
• Menu planning is your idea of fun.
• All your closets are color coded and arranged by season.
• You make your husband's lunch for him, many times the night before so it will be ready when he needs to leave for work.
• You wonder if you can vacuum the lint/dust off the vacuum cleaner.  Then laugh because you think vacuuming the vacuum is hysterical.  Because yeah...it kinda is....
• Coffee is your drug of choice.
• Your home is on a cleaning schedule.  Mondays are for laundry, Tuesdays are for bathrooms, Wednesdays are....
• You can bake a cake.  From scratch.
• You're pretty sure you should invest in a laminator.
• You have a day of the week for grocery shopping.  Usually the day when the new sales come out or the day where they markdown items.
• You wouldn't dare go out in public without makeup on!
• You iron your curtains.
• You have the cleanest refrigerator of anyone you know.  Since you clean it every week, that baby sparkles!
• Your Pinterist is full of cleaning tips and DIY projects.
• Stuff on your kitchen counter is your arch nemesis.
• You actually wash and clean your shoes.  And your family's shoes. 
• Your dining room table is always ready for the next meal & you actually light the candles & turn on music for dinner with the family. 
• You have neatly labeled tote bins for all your holiday supplies.  Broken down by specific holiday of course.
• Lists are your favorite thing in the whole wide world!
• When someone in your house gets sick, you whip up a batch of your homemade chicken noodle soup and then disinfect the crap out of everything.
• You hate clutter.
• Anyone has ever made fun of you and compared you to "Martha".

Alright- so this was all in fun but seriously- taking care of your home used to be celebrated.  Sadly, now it's almost as if it's no longer socially acceptable to be a Wife, a Mother and most of all- a Homemaker.  While I've personally never been too concerned with what other people think of me, I am just a bit sad to think that our next generation will be growing up without an understanding of this art form.  Because you guys- being a wonderful homemaker is indeed an art.  It's something worth cherishing and celebrating and hopefully it will continue to be passed down to the next generation of Wives and Mothers.

Want to read more?

• Marriage- A Traditional Housewife
• Guidelines in the Running of Your Home
• On Being a Traditional Wife
• Marriage-The Good Wife's Guide

Nothing Like a Baby....

To make you loose your shit.

With Mother's Day fast approaching...OK, it's tomorrow, Mother's Day is tomorrow- I wanted to take a moment and reflect on Motherhood.

Growing up, I used to dream of my future family.  My dream man and the perfect, adorable and well behaved children we would create together.  We would live in a fabulous yet not ostentatious home that featured a washing machine that magically washed, dried and folded the clothes and a stainless steel kitchen that conjured up steaming plates of mac and cheese with the touch of a button.

A said it was a dream, right?

Ok, so clearly my 10 year old mind had a touch of the "fantastic" but what I nailed hands down was the feeling of my family.  The feeling of love, of belonging, of rightness- yeah, I said rightness.  You guys, this feeling is here.

I'll be honest- the little girl dreams look nothing like my reality.  I work all the time. Like, all the time.  We homeschool.  Ummm....yeah, never thought THAT would happen.  My kitchen appliances do not match- I repeat, my appliances do not match.  There's no magical washer and dryer.

But I've got my dream man.  Only, he's flawed.  Like seriously, big time, flawed.  But here's the thing- so am I.  And I have my perfect, adorable child who just so happens to have a very stubborn and independent streak with hints of authoritative defiance but oh- the most beautiful blue eyes.

Motherhood is not what I thought it would be.  

I thought I would be a different kind of Mother.  I thought I would be more patient, more soft, I thought I would cry less, battle less, struggle less.  It's just nothing at all like I imagined it to be and yet- it's everything I ever wanted.

Every night, I tell my child that I love him.  Even when he's frustrating the ever loving crap out of me, I still love him.  I let him know this.  All.  The.  Time.  And you guys- most times he tells me he loves me too.

This is Motherhood.

Soul deep unexplainable love for the little creatures that cause so much havoc.  Unending patience and forgiveness.  The desire to make each day better than the last.  The ability to oversee the unwound toilet paper rolls winding down the stairs, the mud splatters on the wall and the cracker crumbs on your shirt sleeve.  The knowledge that even if you're wearing silk and their hands are covered in mud, you will still reach in for that hug.  Every.  Single.  Time.

This is Love.

And most times it's very different from the dream.  It's better.

Kale Pesto

Who knew that pesto was seriously SO easy?!?

SO good!

To make this yummy dish, you'll need to start with the Alfredo sauce base.  Then simply add in half of this kale pesto recipe and serve with your favorite pasta.  It's ridiculously simple.  Trust me.

Kale Pesto

4 cups kale
1/4 cup olive oil
1 small handful sunflower seeds
1 garlic clove
1/2 cup Parmesan cheese
salt and pepper, to taste

Combine all ingredients in your food processor.

Add pesto to Alfredo sauce- YUM!

And your done.  No joke- that's it.  I would recommend you give your pesto a little taste test and adjust the ingredients as needed.  Perhaps you like it more "nutty" so put in more seeds, or maybe you want more of a kale flavor, etc.

Now, you can warm this pesto up and serve it as is with your pasta.  I'll warn you though- for the husband and kiddo, it's just TOO MUCH KALE.  Who knew you could have too much of a good thing?!?

You can also schmear it on some toasted sourdough, you can add a few spoonfuls of it to your favorite marinara sauce OR you can add half of it to homemade Alfredo sauce- that's what this recipe is for Mmkay....  It's seriously amaze-balls good and so versatile.  And probably the very best way to get your family to eat kale.  Because kale is weird and most assuredly, an acquired taste but this pesto makes it easy and yummy.  Promise.

Look at that yummy creamy Kale-ness!