10 Things Not to Say to a Homeschooling Mom

I've been a homeschooling Mom for about 8 years now and you WOULD NOT BELIEVE the crap I hear from people.  Ok, well....maybe you would.  Below is my own personal list of things you should NEVER say to a homeschooling parent, period.  And yes- they've all been said to me at one time or another.



#1- But what about socialization?  Oh.  My.  Gawd.  I am beyond done with this question, I just can't.  Do your research you ignorant butt and you'll find that homeschooled kids are WAY better socialized than your precious public schoolers.  Yeah, it's true.

#2- They'll never get into college.  News flash!  College is not the be all end all and no one knows this better than a homeschooling Mom.  I want my child to pursue his passions and if he needs college to do that, then you best believe my boy is getting in.  But it is not our educational goal.  And here's a bit of truth for you, colleges are ACTIVELY recruiting homeschoolers.  If it came down to my well rounded homeschooled student and your peg square public schooler, the homeschooled kid will win it every single time.  Every.  Time.

#3- I didn't know you were a certified teacher.  I'm not but thanks for trying to make me feel stupid.  You do NOT need to be a certified teacher to teach a child, you just don't.  Think back to before you shipped your child off to school, did you never teach them a single thing?  Like ever?  However in the world did they learn to eat with a fork or tie their shoes or lip sync to Madonna?  Oh yeah- you taught them because you are more than qualified and so am I.  So suck it.

#4- Wow, I didn't know you were so religious.  Because EVERY SINGLE HOMESCHOOLER must be over the top religious to follow this path, right?  No.  Where once the homeschooling community consisted of a butt ton of religious families, just as with any demographic- we are growing.  Homeschoolers come in all shapes and sizes, from all different worlds with a crazy variety of beliefs.  Would you believe there's even some who DON'T believe in God?  Yeah, it's true.

#5- Don't you get sick of spending all that time with your kid?  Well, yeah- sometimes.  I'm only human of course!  But when it comes down to it, I want to be the one who teaches and guides him, not some stranger hired by a defunct educational system.  And goodness but that's why they invented outside classes, sports, and this little thing called socialization.  Sure we homeschoolers spend WAY more time with our children than most parents and no joke- it can be rough, we wouldn't have it any other way.  

#6- So what do you do all day?  Well gee...what do YOU do all day?  I certainly hope you aren't trying to imply that I'm lazy here mmkay...because the reality is anything but.  If you're doing this right, it is very much like having a FULL TIME JOB in addition to the FULL TIME JOB of being a wife and mother.  And personally, I have 2 part time jobs so let's just say I work the equivalent of 3 FULL TIME JOBS.  How many do you have again?  What is it that you do all day again?  MmmHmm....sorry but you're not gonna win this one.

#7- How come your kid is watching TV, shouldn't they be doing schoolwork right now?  Ah, you gotta love a schoolwork dictator, right?  Homeschooling is a lifestyle and as such it happens ALL THE TIME.  Even TV can be educational.  There are SO many ways and styles in which to homeschool and educate our children and most of them do NOT replicate a traditional public school setting.  So expand your mind a bit to the concept that kids learn all the time in every thing.

#8- Well I didn't realize public school wasn't good enough for your kids, it works just fine for mine.  Sigh....listen....I am truly NOT judging you.  I'm not.  It works for your family and that's great- but it didn't work for mine.  The reasons behind why people choose to homeschool are vast and most times it has nothing to do with you.  So get over yourself already and let's just agree to not judge each other mmkay...

#9- I didn't know you were allowed to homeschool, is it legal?  Wow.  The government mind control is strong in this one mmkay....listen, I do NOT need to ask permission from anyone to do what I feel is right for my child.  I just don't.  But thanks for implying that I would commit a crime in order to educate my kid.  Homeschooling is legal, in all the states.  Some have more regulations and restrictions than others which sucks balls but yes, for now we are still legally allowed to parent and educate how we want.

#10- Shouldn't your kid be in school?  THEY ARE IN SCHOOL YOU DIP SHIT.  OK, that reply might be too harsh but it is almost always right there on the tip of my tongue.  Good thing for you my parents raised me right and I just keep that little nugget to myself.  But yes, my child is in school.  Even while we are at the grocery store or walking in the park because if you've learned anything from this post I hope it's that homeschooling is a way of life.  Learning is natural and organic and it happens all the bloody time.


Well there you have it, my own personal list of things you should probably never say to a homeschooling Mom.  What would you add to this list?

Chrissie's Top 5 Homeschooling Myths

There are a few things that irritate me more then they should.  Many of those things come from a long list of homeschooling myths.  I'm sure you've probably heard a couple of them....perhaps even believed a few....that's alright, I'll forgive you.  But only if you read this and promise to never believe the myths again.

So here's my top 5, in no particular order.

1.  What about socialization?
Ugh! Nothing bugs me more then an uninformed public school Mom asking me if my child is appropriately socialized.  So I must confess that I've become a bit, shall we say, "snarky" in my reply to this question.  The reality is that homeschoolers are better socialized then their public school peers.  Say what?!? I know, I know...but it's true.  Click here to read a little more about this but here's my short version. Public school kids spend all day, every day in a classroom filled with other kids who are almost identical to them.  Think about it....20-30 (or more) kids of the exact same age, from the same general neighborhood, same basic demographic & social background are the kids your typical public schooler is exposed to on a daily basis.

A homeschooler socializes with a wide range of people.  For example, William's peer group consists of younger kids that I occasionally babysit, kids in his classes at Edmonds Heights who are normally 3 grade levels apart, parents and grandparents of his friends at school, his own grandparents who visit us several times per month, his aunt who we live with, the neighborhood kids one of which is several years older then William and until recently- my co-workers at my part time office job where William went to "work" with me several days per week.

These are his peers.  He's comfortable around ALL people.  He can hold a conversation with your grandma or with your 2 year old nephew because he does it every day, all day.  He knows how to behave in every situation from the grocery store or a friend's 100th birthday party.  He knows this because he lives this.  He goes everywhere with me and interacts with everyone that I interact with- all day, every day.

2.  Oh- you must be very religious to homeschool.
Well sorry to burst your bubble folks, but we aren't.  At all.  It is very possible to homeschool for reasons other then religion.  So I'm sorry, but I don't have 10 sister wives, I don't wear a bun and old-fashioned dress and I don't homeschool because we are religious.  Many do and that's great.  That's just not the reason we homeschool and it sure would be nice if people didn't assume things.  Right?


3.  Something must be "wrong" with your kid.
Can you believe some of the things that come out of people's mouths?!? No filter I tell ya!  So yes, something's definitely wrong with my kid but it has nothing to do with homeschooling.  Child never listens and does as he's told- but I digress.  Seriously, can you believe that some people actually ask this question.  The real answer is- it's none of your f*&%*&* business you *&%$#&! But the nice answer I give to people is- no, there's nothing "wrong" with my kid.  <Insert patronizing smile here>  I can only assume people who ask this question think homeschooled kids have some sort of handicap that keeps them from learning in a "real" school.  Ha! If they only knew what a "real" school was doing to....ok, yikes, I'll just stop right there....

Yes, some children need the individual attention that comes from homeschooling.  But all children thrive in this environment.  And there's nothing "wrong" with that!

4.  You must be very smart to teach your children.
Why thank you...I am very smart.  I'm a genius, sometimes.  But like most folks, I could be a whole lot smarter....but I manage to get by. 

Let me ask you this- when your child was learning to speak, did you think to yourself- "how am I ever going to teach my child to talk? I don't have the proper education".  Or when they started singing their ABC's, did you panic and say "how am I ever going to teach them to write their numbers & letters? I don't have a Master's degree." Of course not!  You weren't worried about your education level then, so why would you worry about it later in their life?
The good news is that you don't have to be a genius to teach your children.  You just have to care and put forth the effort.  Yep, that's it.  And of course when they thirst for knowledge outside of your "genius level" well...you find someone who can teach them! Currently hiring tutors for Physics and Trig, in about 7 years....

5.  Homeschool Moms are SuperMoms.
Sometimes when telling other parents about our lifestyle, I see this glazed look of disbelief cross over their faces.  You do what?  You spend how much time with your kid?  You make all your food from scratch?  You taught your child to read?  You work from home and bring in a full time income?  And so on and so forth.  But let's be honest here- I'm just like any other Mom.  I still yell, I forget to feed the dogs until 9pm on a weeknight (sorry pups!), I warm up veggie chicken nuggets & fries for dinner because I'm too tired from my crazy day and on & on I could go.  See, I'm just like you.  The only difference is that I've made a different choice for my family.  My path is just as hectic and full of struggle as your path is- I'm just heading in the opposite direction.  And that's ok.

So there you have it!  My top 5 homeschooling myths.  Would you add anything to this list?  I'm sure given enough time I could come up with another 5 or 10...perhaps for a different post....